Yesterday I found the need to pull out some of my Zoology texts from URI. Yes, I kept my science books hoping to be able to use them in the future. Feel free to mock. As I was going over body systems in one book, Annabelle turned pages and pulled out loose paper from my Molecular Biology book. Again, mock away. Then Barrett came home and took over Annabelle detail so I could get dinner ready. Soon after, I hear Barrett say, “This is kind of neat. It’s a letter for you from the IMB from 2000!” “Huh, read it.” As soon as he began, I knew exactly what it was…my denial letter. They determined that I was not fit for missionary work until I gained 60 pounds. Yes, this is true. I must have read it at my work back then and stuffed it into my text in anger. “Did you find my denials from Med school as well?” I laughed. I remember they came that same week. What a week.
Yet as I think about that letter, it was the catalyst to move me from Rhode Island to Virginia and begin a graduated life in zoology at a Government IT sales company. Makes logical sense, right? In a year I bought a condo, learned how to cold call government agencies, and had to hit my anorexia head on. This was a life low that hasn’t been matched.
A few years later I gave up my IT calling to move to Thailand and teach science to Jr and Sr high kids. Here I learned how to survive in another very different country with a new language and culture. I learned to listen to people and meet them where they are as well as adapt to an environment very different than my comfort zone. I told the Lord I would go anywhere but Asia, and here I was (and am!). Another lesson.
From Thailand I married a handsome and vivacious man with a heart that loves the Lord and me. Neither has made life easier for him…but both have led to greater sanctification. That’s a good thing, right? Our new life together has brought us many adventures and stamps in our passports, but one of the best things it has brought is Annabelle.
The week I received those rejection letters I thought that I had totally messed up God’s plan for my life. How could I have had such a desire for the mission field and science and be rejected by both? How could the Lord not want me to serve Him by telling others of Jesus? Yet the Lord in His Providence, allowed me a time of trial to change and teach me more about Himself and the need in this world. He made me weak so He could be strong. He took my desired glory and showed me His. His ways are not my ways…Praise the Lord!
I looked at Barrett and Annabelle and was amazed at where the Lord has brought me. Fourteen years Ago, looking at that letter, I would have never guessed I’d be married, have an amazing kid, and be living in Okinawa. Kind of an odd Valentine letter, but one of the best.